Book 18 IELTS General Writing Test 4
Answers
Model Answer
This model has been prepared by an examiner as an example of a very good answer.
“Dear Me Karim,
Thank you very much again for sending me on the Workplace Safety course. It was valuable training and I now feel a lot more confident that I know how to prevent accidents in the factory. We covered points such as safe storage, keeping access ways clear and fire safety.
I can report that I have already used the skills I learned; when I noticed some cables that were a trip hazard and also a large bin that was partially blocking the exit, I was able to identify and fix those problems straight away.
I understand that employees who started working with us this year have already received this training as part of their orientation but for those who have been here longer, it would be a good opportunity to refresh and add to their knowledge.
It is a well-run course that is very relevant to our workplace and I am grateful for the opportunity. Many thanks”
Here are comments from another examiner:
This is a good response to the task: it addresses all three bullet points, uses a suitable tone to communicate with an employer and is presented in the correct letter format. There is clear progression throughout the letter, but there could be more evidence to justify why the course might not be suitable for colleagues (the final bullet point). There are some effective cohesive devices [that those who], but a wider range of linking expressions than [and | but would improve the final rating.
Vocabulary is used well, and there is some effective collocation [prevent accidents trip hazard | partially blocking). Grammatical structures include simple and complex examples [started working with us | have been here longer], but most of the letter is in the past simple and past simple tenses.
To achieve the highest scores, the candidate would need to include a wider range of cohesive devices and grammatical structures. They could improve the response by providing further suggestions on why the course may not be suitable for other colleagues. Overall, it is a good response.
Model Answer
This model has been prepared by an examiner as an example of a very good answer.
“It is true that nothing in life is permanent except change. Changes in society and our own lives are inevitable. We all get older, friends and family move away, and our employment situation can suddenly change. Understandably, many people wish everything could stay the same. In this essay, I would like to consider the reasons for this view and explain why it is better to embrace change. Wanting to feel in control of our lives is perfectly normal. We often feel vulnerable when events in society occur which are beyond our control or when we cannot be sure of the outcome of something. The uncertainty caused by the COVID-19 pandemic is an example of this. Changes in our personal circumstances can also be hard to accept. For example, when a friend or family member moves away, we may experience a deep sense of loss. Ironically, even good changes can bring uncertainty. If we receive a promotion, we may struggle with imposter syndrome and wrestle with a fear of failure.
Despite these perfectly natural feelings, I think it is good to embrace change. Since change is unavoidable, it is much better to accept reality than to become consumed by negative thinking. When we remain positive, we may find that a change actually benefits us in the long run. Adapting to change also helps us develop resilience, a quality that can help us face an obstacle and see an opportunity in it.
As highlighted above, sooner or later, we will all face change, while change is unsettling, it is vital to keep focused on the positive aspects of our circumstances. Doing so can help us unlock new opportunities we didn’t know were available to us.”
Here are comments from another examiner:
This essay is a high-level response that covers all aspects of the question. In the second paragraph, reasons are presented on why people in society as a whole and individuals might resist change. Then, the third paragraph gives clear reasons to suggest that, overall, this is a positive process. The position is consistent and the conclusion ties both areas together for a strong finish.
Ideas are logically organised. Cohesive devices [Ironically | Despite these As highlighted above Doing so can] are used highly effectively and paragraphing is helpful.
Vocabulary is natural and sophisticated [embrace change | deep sense of
loss | consumed by negative thinking | develop resilience]. Sentence structure demonstrates full flexibility, with a wide range of complex examples within a range of largely error-free multi-clause sentences.
Little needs to be added to improve the rating other than possibly an example to illustrate why changes should be seen as positive, in the third paragraph. However, this is a very good high-level response.